Friday, April 29, 2011

Always fall for your type, Jack

The whole day spent watching Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse. I watch one of them once but it had been long long time ago that I myself couldn't figured out when it was. Thinking during my matriculation. Again, I fall for someone that everyone else not even paid attention for in the movies. guess who? it's not Edward that I wanted so much, he is Jacob I'm head-to-toe crazy over wuwuuuuu admit it, I always fall for second hero with that kind of sad face for being a second choice and being neglected even Bella had him in her heart as well. for sure, she can have them both that made her choose Edward. 
can I have this kind silence-ignored-lover that will stick to me even with me ignored him all the time.

Despite, I still love Edward's words, how he showed he is the one most protective to his girl. Those are words said by them Edward, Bella Swan and tough Jacob in the movie that mesmerized me most of the times. how if someone coming to say all those towards me and I'm melting.... 
I prefer this sawo-matang skin tone rather than pale fair Edward Cullen

I forget who said this. 
“Love is irrational, I reminded myself. The more you loved someone, the less sense anything made.”

“It’s so hard to describe. It’s not like love at first sight, really. It’s more like…gravity moves. When you see her, suddenly it’s not the earth holding you here anymore. She does. And nothing matters more than her. And you would do anything for her, be anything for her…You become whatever she needs you to be, whether that’s a protector, or a lover, or a friend, or a brother.”

“It’s not like love at first sight, really. It’s more like… gravity moves. When you see her, suddenly it’s not the earth holding you here anymore. She does. And nothing matters more than her. And you would do anything for her, be anything for her… You become whatever she needs you to be, whether that’s a protector, or a lover, or a friend, or a brother.” -Jacob

"You give me everything just by breathing" - Edward

“Before you my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars-points of light and reason. And then you shot across the sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything. -Edward 

“I can’t live in a world where you don’t exist.” -Edward

“When I Left you, Bella, I left you bleeding. Jacob was the one who stitched you back up again. That was bound to leave its mark- on the both of us. I’m not sure that kind of stitches dissolve on their own. I can’t blame either of you for something I made necessary. I may gain forgiveness, but that does not let me escape the consequences.” -Edward 

What if you sincerely believed something was true, but you were dead wrong? What if you weres o stubbornly sure that you were right, that you wouldnt even consider the truth? Would the truth be silenced, or would it try to break through? Option three: Edward loved me. The bond forged between us was not one that could be broken by absence, distance, or time. And no matter how much more special or beautiful, or brilliant or perfect than me he might be, he was irreversably altered as i was. As i would always belong to him, so would he always be mine. Was that what id been trying to tell myself?

It hurts to breath every breath because every breath I take proves that I cant live without you…- Edward 

“if i could dream of anything, it would be of you” - Edward 

How can I put this so that you’ll believe me? You’re not asleep, and you’re not dead. I’m here, and I love you. I have always loved you, and I will always love you. I was thinking of you, seeing your face in my mind, every second that I was away. When I told you that I didn’t want you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy. - Edward 

“i love, i always have loved you adn i always will love you. I was thinkng of you, seeing your face in my mind every second i was away. When i told you i didnt love you anymore it was the balckest form or blaphemy” 

“Even more, I had never meant to love him. One thing I truly knew – knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest – was how love gave someone the power to break you.
I’d been broken beyond repair.”– Bella 

“Without the dark, we’d never see the stars.” –Bella

I wondered how long this could last. Maybe someday, years from now-if the pain would just decrease to the point where i could bear it- I would be able to look back on those few short months that would always be the best of my life. And, if it were possible that the pain would ever soften enought to allow me to do that, I was sure that I would feel grateful for as much time as he’d given me. More than I’d asked for, more than I deserved. Maybe someday I’d be able to see it that way. But what if this hole never got any better? If the raw edges never healed? If the damage was permanent and ireversible?” - Bella

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Exam week and die hard fan

I am afraid of getting depression during this hectic exam week then I decided to do this crazy thing then. going to a concert for the first time in my life 2 days before my final exam, awesome isn't it? thinking that I might never have this chance anymore I was like "peduli ape aku. dah seminggu aku study why not go for only few hours?" hahaha am I crazy enough to forget my notes and have fun there.? those who nodded ur head just now should see this first
we didn't forget a bunch of notes even we are eager enough to scream loud seeing our dream guy perform live.
 .explaining to myself why I have to read notes in that kind of place. btw, I love nasi kandar and this is where we were, lepaking at nasi kandar while waiting for concert, just near the Renaissance, where the concert will be.
this is what we call love at first sight.during his previous visit at mydinmall, kubang kerian. there I got free exclusive ticket for the concert at Renaissance Hotel.
again, I fall in love that make it love at second sight ahaha
crying inside listening to him singing meraung *used to be my fav song and never expect it still is
he was about 2metres in front me and i'm unconsciously screaming loud shouting 'TOMOKKKKKKKKK' can imagine? so buruk that I will never to that to any other man. consider him lucky enough haha
his sweet smiling face smiling in front of me made me out of control that I cant even fall asleep that night.
 back then, i regret this much when I come back I saw he is getting married with a 31-year-old stewardess. *sigh. can't you really tell a women with charming and the one without? I cry myself for days for my taken away groom-to-be. wuwuuwuuuu no doubt, will keep supporting you no matter what. love you shah indrawan. do come again eating nasi kak wok and yati ayam percik with me and you can bring along your ayu *i envy you

Friday, April 15, 2011

Roses are red

pre dinner. love this pic's atmosphere.
ten of us :) another 8 missing :(

we singing kau ilhamku and melody by sheila majid.
me and hasifah gorgoes :)
me and lovely khadijah :)
me smiling with with my cheek up. thanks to my chubby face ahahaa

Nikon Coolpix S3100

this is me with my new love :)

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Time and fate

Time might lead me somewhere away from you and fate might wipe me away from your memory. But I will always be thankful to Allah that once in the journey of my life I used to walk together and smile with you been the reason for the smile on my face.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

This isn't joke

text from +6289694930110 said,

"ni ayah, gune fon police, tolong bagi credit mexis 30 ringgit ke nombo bru ayah 0128650385 ayah lgi ade msalah kt balai police. ta payah call, kejap baru ayah call."

and you will never know how much it hurts me. this is moron phishing and it isn't joke for me.

Saturday, April 2, 2011


baru berani riba dak kecik cinonet neh. kecik ape, 10hr je dh bape kilo naek. dah 3.2 kg dpd  asal birth weight 2.82 kg.
cepat besar alia deh :)

paling best kulit kita same putih sama gebu je tidak haha 

okay ada satu story aku nak merepek kat sini. aku tak tahu entah aku ke ni tapi aku happy sangat 2 3 minggu ni. nak kata sebab alia haha bukanlah but she's part of it. normal kot aku rasa happy bila aku rasa dah cukup apa yang aku ada sekarang, ada Allah tempat mengadu bila dan mintak ape-ape je, jiwa tenang takde kacau dengan masalah hati, ada orang-orang yang aku sayang dan sayangkan aku sekeliling aku. alhamdulilah aku dapat balik rasa yang aku pernah rasa setahun lepas. mungkin aku dah recover daripada kesedihan dan kesedihan. baru semalam baca balik entry 100 hari  arwah ayah dan i just can't help, wajib nangis. i'm just being a normal daughter who crying whenever see someone resembles ayah while walking in the street. al fatihah, rindu ayah sangat-sangat. semalam buat macaroni bakar and i know, ayah je yang akan makan dan puji kalau aku masak western, yang laen selera nak kampung je. okay enough is enough. 

tapi ni la bila masuk part belajar aku tahu aku akan jadi orang paling stress. aku dah separuh jalan nak capai cita-cita aku tapi tula, bukan happy dan semakin yakin dengan apa yg aku akan dapat tapi aku takut ada la. sekarang belajar sangat-sangat kritikal sebab semua subject macam sangat technical and aku ni pulak agak la lambat siket nak catch up. bila part nak study balik tu pulak takde masa kahkah alasan pemalas. 

sekali nak mintak semua doakan aku untuk minggu last before study week ni. this tough starts esok dengan test electrophysiological test. isnin ada presentation epidemiology dan aku dah siapkan slides untuk part aku. then on wed, aku ada case presentation. warghhh ini paling tak best sebab macam patient aku amik ni sakit dia chronic sangat. jenuh aku nak study pasal penyakit dia adoiii wuwuwuwuuuu. last, on thurs, test advanced audiological techniques. ni pun paling mencabar punya subject yang aku selalu je blur blur dalam kelas. this last week before study lweek ni pun still kena ganti kelas malam ala-ala nak UPSR dulu sebab ada lagi kelas yang tak habis. entah bila entah aku nak study and prepare untuk present. tapi aku akan usahakan juga untuk jogging tetiap petang huhu semangat okay jaja.!

okay, kena baca buku dulu and owh, hari ni aku buat kek gula hangus which is my favourite :)